The lights off and the door has closed
But right now I don’t know
How to feel
Or if this is even real
They told me this day was coming along
But thinking about it felt wrong
How do you prepare yourself for this
You used to be here and now your someone I miss
You’ve gone on a journey I can’t follow
And since the day you left I feel empty and hollow
It came as the hardest blow
And I just didn’t know
What to do, how to feel
I longed for the news not to be real
In my head I replay
The words that were said but they stay the same
I listen as they say your name
Sitting on the front row
Like I’m waiting in the theatre for a show
I clench my hands tight
And hold back the tears with all my mind
I want to be strong
I want to be told someone got this all wrong
I want to see you walk through the door
I want to hear your made up stairs once more
How do I grieve
When I never wanted you to leave
How do I learn to let go
When you were the star of my show
Even before you left I knew once you were gone, without you there would be something my life would lack
And even if I asked you couldn’t come back
The cancer put your body under attack
But your heart remained the same
All I can do is smile at the memories when someone says your name
The lights off and the door has closed
But right now I know
I don’t have to know how to feel
And some days it will never be real
They told me this day was coming along
And thinking about it will always feel wrong
Stacey Lipowski 